Biblical ‘Epic’ Exploitation Film Absolute Vow Unleashes Mad Trailer

absolute-vow

Once in a great while; a motion picture comes along that grips you to your spiritual core, while tantalizing with terror, tormenting with elements of horror, and tranquilizing you with fear. The film in question: Absolute Vow. Viewers will be instantly immersed into a stunning world of surrealism, in glorious two-strip technicolor. A rekindling of the deep faith you once had. It is the latest from Grindhouse Guru, Jared Masters. A true Biblical tragedy.  The strange, brutal story of Jephthah’s daughter.

So begins the press release for Absolute Vow, which looks hilariously bad, and so almost certainly a must-see this year. We’re assuming that this is not all that sincere a religious movie, given that the cast includes Troma Films head Lloyd Kaufman, Mayor of the Sunset Strip Rodney Bigenheimer and performers from films like After School Massacre, Club Lingerie and Ballet of Blood, and is directed by a man who refers to himself as ‘the Sultan of Sensationalism’. Well done, Jared Masters, whoever you are.

Clearly a must for fundamentalist wackos who want a bit of Old Testament mixed with exploitation cinema, and for connoisseurs of the bizarre, the film will be heading your way very soon.